Soul Shakers... I have had some sharing my posts with a warning to the public to "be cautious" of my new aged ways, as it is not Christian. So, I decided to put together this open letter to all the Naysayers, current and old. It's a touch longer, but be honest... we are in quarantine... you have nothing better to do anyway :), So have a read... You'll be happy you did.
Naysayer: noun- a person who criticizes, objects to, or opposes something.
What I really hear you saying in your posts is, “I wonder what this Jaimie Marie believes to be true about God?” I know you are scared to just ask me directly... I know asking makes you uncomfortable, as you may get a response that challenges you or forces you to open up to hear more deeply with your heart... I know you are scared of opening that heart up, because there might be pain there that you are gripping so very tight. (My post Evolve anyway might help) So, I’m going to do you a favor and ease your uncomfortableness by taking what I know to be your inner curiosity, and bring it into the light of healing.
Here’s the thing... I am Christian. Catholic to be exact. I was raised going to church every Sunday, and I was educated in parochial schools my entire life. Well, minus my 7th and 8th grade year when I transferred to a public school near my home. You see... those were years my parents did not like what was going on in my catholic school... they didn’t like the way the priest was leading and/or manipulating people to follow his rules.
So, without fear, they pulled me out and put me in an excellent public school, while we still attended church every Sunday. That was pivotal for me, as it taught me that even in faith... even in religion... it’s okay to stand up and say when something feels wrong or no longer works for your family. It’s okay to take a stand, when you see corrupt humanness trying to lead in the name of God.... AND my parents also showed me that God is bigger than the Church here on earth. That you can disagree with leadership, but that doesn’t mean you abandon God or your faith. I am so eternally grateful to my parents for that lesson, for it became the backbone of how I live my life today.
You see, not only was I born and raised Catholic, but I was also born with the precious ability to see, feel, and understand subtle energy fields around everything and everyone. Yes, this seeing includes seeing deceased loved ones and angels. Yes, it includes seeing how the human energy field shapes, forms, and operates within its human container. Yes, it includes seeing and talking with God; The Maker as he asked me to call Him.
So... there I was... a little girl seeing the world so very differently... having all these “new age” abilities as you call them, Nah Sayer... and wondering why so many Christian people taught lessons about “my kind” being the devil... being evil in form... being anti-god... and living your life to try and do everything you can to avoid people like me.
I was so sad, wondering how it was that I could do nothing wrong, no harm to anyone or any animal, and how I could feel so much love in my heart; yet live in a world of people that would condemn me in an instant, just because I experienced God in different ways than they did... My heart and my head could not understand....
So, guess what I did, Nay Sayer...
I hid myself. I buried my connection to God soooooo deep down that sometimes even I forgot it was there. I lived terrified that if I ever showed the world how I knew God and experienced him, I would be condemned... I’d be called a quack... a looney tune... a devil worshipper... a trickster... and a fraud.
But even with that massive level of denying myself love... even with the massive insecurity I carried everywhere, that I wasn’t good, strong enough, pretty enough, smart enough... The Maker persisted... He continued to call me... He even took me to heaven one night when I was about 19 yrs old.
God never gave up on me. God never asked me to stop seeing and feeling and knowing energy and life. God never asked me to stop connecting with loved ones that passed.
You want to know what He actually asked me to do??
The Maker told me to rise up, exactly as I am. The Maker asked me to always share and teach his truth, and nothing but the truth. The Maker said he made me exactly as I am for a purpose, and in order to fulfill that purpose, I need all of me in the light... not just the pieces deemed acceptable by a people that don’t know any better.
The Maker never once in my life, ever, stopped calling me... talking to me... or loving me.
But even so, I continued to hide... and cry.... and be paralyzed in fear... and scream out (silently of course... I didn’t want the righteous Christians to hear me)
“why me?!?? Leave me alone!! I just want to fit in!! I don’t want this job!”
There were also times I would get brave enough to share some of these experiences with the only outlet I knew wouldn’t judge me; my family. And I can say with total confidence, it is truly their love and support that helped carried me through!
But… My inner battle carried on, which led to my 20’s being filled with chronic migraines, immense sadness, drinking to forget, and fatigue. By 30, I had a young family, a loving husband, and everything seemed picture perfect, but the sadness and disconnection within was tearing me apart. One day, I found myself crying out to The Maker...
“I can’t keep living this way! I’m done feeling so broken and lost. I surrender!”
The Maker, clear as day, responded… and even though it was 10 years ago, I remember it like it just happened. He said:
“Do you believe that those in your world know better than the one that created it? Do you believe that the one that created you did so to watch you suffer? I am the Maker of all things, big and small. I am the energy in all things and of all things. I flow through you and everyone you meet... and it is only The Maker of the masterpiece that is able to see and understand its complete beauty.. a beauty that cannot be fully known when viewing from a single thread woven within it. Faith is your trust in me... your life is my love in you”
In that very moment... I stood up, wiped my tears (even though they were flowing heavier than they ever had before), and I made a commitment to dust off all my hidden treasures... I made a commitment to never hide out again... I made a commitment to never judge anyone else’s practice, journey, connection, or religion to God... even yours Naysayer. I committed, there in my living room, to allow The Makers love to flow through me to everything and everyone I touch.
I healed all my brokenness… I shifted the way I lived my life… I released my shame and my fear... I enrolled in the School of Energy Medicine… I opened a full-service health and wellness center… I wrote and taught spiritual teachings to connect individuals, like yourself, back to The Makers love. I use(d) my mastery in Energy Medicine to bring forth great healing to those that are suffering physically, mentally, emotionally, and/or spiritually. I brought forth a new connection for individuals and their departed loved ones, so they can know each other more powerfully than they did in humanness. I've used The Makers love in me to help THOUSANDS of hearts to heal… lives to shift... and I do it all for my love of the masterpiece; The Makers vision manifest.
So yeah.... I guess you can say I’m pretty freaking new aged... and pretty freaking old school too…. And to be honest, I’m pretty certain that’s exactly what our world needs now more than ever.
I love you, Naysayer, and I honor your thread in The Makers masterpiece. I am so grateful that you were brave enough to show your curiosity, even if in a crude form, about what I believe to be truth about God. I hope this helps you to see it is okay to support The Maker in all forms, even if different from your own.